The Sinister Sunday.

Listed on humor-blogs.com…

Unlike most of you, I don’t have that much in common with god. I have never impregnated a carpenter’s wife by remote control. You want loaves and fishes? Get your own. I’ve also never leveled a city because I didn’t like the way some of the folks get jiggy. But like The Jeebus Daddy, (acts of transubstantiation notwithstanding) I do take Sundays off.

And on the seventh day, I slacked the hell off. My slack-assery will become more evident as you examine the product. Without further biblical reference, let’s hit the Sinister Six; those news stories from the last little while that I enjoyed, but not enough to warrant a full post.

1. In Arkansas, six nuns from an order known as The Army of Mary were excommunicated from the Catholic Church because their leader claimed to be possessed by the Virgin Mary. Normally, I eschew these kinds of things, but the Church has rules and they don’t want to come off looking stupid. If they don’t draw a line here people might start believing in really weird stuff like people rising from the dead. Wait…what?

2. Michael Vick answered the question “is he really that stupid?” by getting caught reefer-laden while being court supervised. But let’s look at this for a minute. He’s home with a lot of money and a great deal of free time on his hands, what did you expect? At least when he’s floating through his THC-fueled haze, he’s unlikely to kill anything. He’s the victim here; he’s taking reasonable steps to ensure that he’s a threat nothing more than a two-pound bag of Cheetos and now the court sticks him with this. If we don’t treat him more carefully, he might go out and do something unreasonable.

3. The makers of Miller and Coors beer brands have united to better challenge the competition. Now, as a Canadian beer consumer, I can only assume that the real outcome of this will be that all the cats can now whiz into the same vats.

4. JK Rowling, apparently in the fear of having a week when she is not featured in the news, announced in a reading that the wizard Dumbledore is gay. I have enormous respect for what Rowling has accomplished, and her words on this are better than mine:

“Oh, my god,” Rowling concluded with a laugh, “the fan fiction.”

Eeeeeewwwwww…and, yes, I’m the one person who’s never read a Harry Potter book.

5. Hillary Clinton (D – Catch me if you can) announced that people should eat more carrots. In addition to making her sound like the Field Marshall for the Army of the Nanny State, it also misses a more pressing concern; the things that her husband asks people to put in their mouths.

6. The Anglican Church has reached some sort of compromise to keep the British and American wings of the assembly together after having differing practices on homosexuality for a number of years. The result is apparently less moderate and tolerant than was hoped.

There’s not much funny here, and I realize I’m taking a double whammy at religion. It does make me think of that Biblical story where Jesus sent away all those people who smelled funny, had big noses or used the word ‘irregardless’ since its not really a word at all. He was like that, you know.

The Sinister Single.

Normally, my weekend posts offer a nod to six decidedly less lame offerings. I have been away from TRE for about three weeks and I read several very good posts that I wanted to write about – some of them were even free of nudity. However, what also happened in the last three weeks was the delivery of my copy of Antisocial Commentary: From the Secret Files of the Mattress Police. As you may know, this book was written by my blogger pimp, Diesel who still considers that name to be a good idea. Diesel also runs the site splattered across my sidebars: Humor-blogs.com.

I don’t normally even entertain the idea of doing reviews (see what I did there?). In this case, however, I think that I probably should. As a caveat, very few things make me laugh; I’m a tough room. If you can force a snicker out of me, then you did good.

Diesel’s book is funny. I laughed out loud every few pages and I chuckled more often than not between every flip. More importantly, the book is very, very readable. To collect 150+ pages from hundreds of posts and have it flow from start to finish is quite a feat. All in all, this is a good read and an anthology worthy of purchase.

The number of chapters devoted to hard core pornography and scrotal abuse were really out of place, but I understand they’ve been taken out of the current version.

Good work, Diesel.

 

 

 

 

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